This post is dedicated to Jayne, who lives with this horror every day, and to Julia, who knows that this is an international epidemic.
Look guys, I think we need to have a fundraiser. We’re going to be raising awareness for elderly and disabled bags that clearly don’t get enough seats on the bus. Seats that are otherwise greedily taken up by elderly, pregnant, and disabled humans (eugh, humans).
These poor bags have to carry groceries from point A to point B and then suffer the disgrace and shame of being placed on the floor like some kind of objects. The humiliation and lack of empathy is astounding. Where’s the ACLU? Where’s Rosa Parks? WHERE IS THE JUSTICE?
The elderly are practically sacred to me. Not just because I hope to be one someday, and not just because they’ve lived through all the awful crap that inevitably comes with decades of life, but because the world is moving at such a crazy pace that even I have a hard time keeping up, and these people are expected to keep up as their ability to do so slips away. It’s a lonely, alienating experience that makes you feel like you no longer know or belong in the world in which you live.
Um, that’s just dust in my eye.
Anyway, lord have mercy on you if I see you remain seated when an elderly person gets on the bus and starts looking around for a place to sit.
I swear, if it takes them more than 5 seconds of holding on to that dirty bar and looking around uncomfortably before you finally peel your ass from the seat and offer them a place, I will make your skull burn with my fiery glare.
But if you just let them keep standing like that while you play your Flappy Angry Pigeon game, your head bowed over the screen like you’re praying to the gods of mobile gaming to help you beat your high score, I WILL SMITE YOU WHERE YOU SIT!